I Love the Lord (feat. The Georgia Mass Choir)

Parenting Through God Part ll by Detra Allen

So one day, early in the morning, LaRoe asked if I would take him to the pool. I promised him “Yes”. He was thrilled and went on about his day!! He came back a few minutes later and asked when,  but because I was overwhelmed with billing I couldn’t give him an exact time. So I just told him “Later.” Although anxious and anticipating the big splash from his cannon ball he was still ok with my response. Later came and went, and the sun was starting to set as he asked if I was sure I was going to take him. I responded and said “Yes, don’t you believe me?” Disappointment started to kick in and I could see that he was starting to doubt me. He went back outside for awhile and I was thinking at last he has found something else to do besides keep asking me about the pool. But to my surprise, the entire time he was outside, he was knocking on every last friend of his door to see if one of their parents would take them to the pool. Not only was he unsuccessful but he was also hot, sweaty and exhausted as well.

I then became disappointed and little embarrassed that my son was depending on someone else to do what I had promised I would do for him. What were those parents thinking about me? Did they think I didn’t care about him and that I wasn’t the good mom that he and everybody else says that I am? I’m always talking about how much I love my children but I couldn’t even take him the pool. My response was “Didn’t I say, “I” was going to take you?” He said “yea but I won’t to go now”.

I obliged because I had promised him I would. There was only two hours left before the pool closed and I knew it would take him an hour to get dressed, so I told him to get ready. By then I would done taking care of business. As parents we provide food, shelter, and clothing but kids don’t see and appreciate those things even though that’s all they need to survive. But anyway, he was not prepared at all. He couldn’t find his goggles, trunks, towel, or swimming shoes. And for everything he couldn’t find not only did he ask me where they were, he asked me to get them for him too. I did not!! I explained to him that not only was he old enough and responsible enough to get them on his own but I needed him to it his self so that I could help his sister get dressed who had also pooped, so she needed me NOW. 


Finally he was dressed and ready to go.

On the way to the pool, I asked him where his goggles were and he told me that he left them outside the other day and when he went back to get them they were gone. He had the nerve to ask me if I would buy him another pair. I asked him “why would I when you didn’t even take care of the ones I gave you.” But because I love him so much I let him use mine anyway. 

We get to the pool and because he was mad at me, he wasn’t being nice to any of the other kids. He complained and wouldn’t share MY goggles with any of the kids. I was furious!!! After 15 minutes of being in the pool, being told repeatedly to obey, and discontinue his unkindly actions; it was time to go. He didn’t deserve to be at the pool and it dawned on me that he didn’t even say thank you. He had to come home take his shower and sit in his room until I felt he was he ready to come out. 

After being in his room for hours, he told me that he had learned his lesson, was tired of being punished, and apologized so remorsefully for the way he behaved and agreed to listen to me from then on and asked if I would please give him another chance at going to the pool. I lovingly accepted his apology, and let him  off of punishment, but did not respond to the pool comment. He knew that my silence meant no. He was a little disappointed but not surprised.

Later that day he cleaned up his room so well you would have thought the president was coming, and even had all his swim gear nicely packed in his summer bag. I would look outside in the days to follow to find him, being kind to others, sharing, and doing the right things. And it was so genuine. He wasn’t looking for anything in return. He just wanted to make me proud and show his appreciation for everything I had already done. He had given up all hope of ever going to the pool again and that was fine. He was just happy that at least he wasn’t on punishment or on my good side. And that’s when, when I saw him loving for me, sharing with others, respecting and obeying my rules, working hard to take care of his home and his belongings, giving his money to homeless and other random acts of kindness, basically, just caring about others more than he cared about himself. That’s when I decided to take him to the pool. He had given up all hope of ever going to the pool again but he didn’t given give up on me. He could have chosen to go another route and still be upset about not going to the pool and could have taken his anger out on others but he didn’t.

 

I use this example to show how in the beginning we trust that God is going to fulfill all the promises he made to us. While waiting we grow impatient and start to doubt God. We then turn to other people and other resources to fulfill our needs, only to be disappointed and drained mentally and physically. All the while we’re forgetting that our God is a jealous God. Imagine how that makes him feel. You were once a believer and praised HIM. Now those same people you went to when you thought God wasn’t there are now questioning your faith and theirs as well. “God is always saying how he loves his children, why is he taking her through this?” But we fail to see how God takes care of our basic needs and we should be thankful for that. There’s someone out there less fortunate than you that may need God’s attention a little more than you do right now. 

But finally God gives us what we ask for but we aren’t even ready because instead of trusting, working hard and preparing for our blessing, we keep trying to find other ways to get the “yes, right now” and can’t accept the “no, not yet”. If we’re asking God for a job, we need to be filling out applications, polishing our interview skills, and getting our wardrobe together. Waiting with expectancy!! But because we aren’t prepared we can’t even enjoy it. This could be the day! Are you ready? And instead of thanking God for our new home we’ve been asking for, we’re still complaining because we didn’t get the house with the two door garage. Therefore, taking our anger out on others and not even sharing that home which is really God’s house in the first place with others in need when the time presents itself . Or maybe 15 months after you get into your new house, you choose a vacation over paying your house note, and neglect to invest in the maintenance or upkeep of your home. Until, at last it is taken from you just as fast as you got it. From that point forward everything seems to be going wrong and you have nothing then but to feel like God is punishing you. Sometimes God has to put us where we don’t want us to be in order to get us where he needs us to be. 

Eventually, you can’t take it anymore. You repent and ask God for his forgiveness and another chance and His silence feels like a “no”. But you don’t care. He forgave you and gave you another chance at life, hence the fact you are alive and reading this post. We all have a second chance, for many it’s another chance, it’s time for us to start loving him, sharing with others, respecting and obeying his commandments, working hard to take care of the things he’s blessed us with (Good Steward), tithing and other random acts of kindness, basically, just caring about others more than we care about ourselves and not expecting anything in return. Doing good deeds to make him proud and show our appreciation for what he has already done. That is when God takes us to where we want to go. You may have given up on your dream but don’t give up on God. 

To understand more about God’s promises visit this page http://www.joelosteen.com/HopeForToday/ThoughtsOn/Finances/ClaimyourInheritance/Pages/ClaimyourInheritance.aspx

My prayer is that God used me as a vessel to bless someone else tonight as this note as truly giving me more understanding!!!

A Lesson From My Daddy Part 1

The CCb would like to welcome new addition to the family, Ms. Detra Allen. As a stay at home mother, entrepreneur and a child of God, growing and learning more about life, family, and of course above all, the Lord, Detra has many words of encouragement for mother's like ourselves, to share with the willing and listening soul. This is the 1st installment of Parenting Through God. Please stay tuned for many more.


For so long I've been trying to figure out the secret to life so that I can save my children time and teach it to them. Today I learned that I wasted a lot time a lot of years actually, and accepted, FINALLY, that I will never know the answers, and I'm ok with that. So actually, one of the best things I can do for my children is not explain to them why I make the decisions that I make. I'm reminded of a time when LaRoe asked for chocolate milk and I told him no without explanation. He couldn't understand but I knew I had plans for icecream after dinner. My ultimate goal would be that eventually he learns to trust and respect my no's and yet have faith, believe and expect the best yes even when he doesn't understand. And I should trust God that way. But until I build that kind of trust with LaRoe I do know that LaRoe trusts me in other areas. He doesn't sit his room worrying how the rent is going to be paid this month or whether its a good idea to spend money on fun friday this week, or not eating all of his food because he wants to make sure he has something to eat tomorrow. Just the thought of that saddens me. What if he did? What if he turned down his allowance because he was afraid he wouldn't be able to pay the light bill. I would tell him that's not his responsibility and to just have fun and be a child. That's how God wants us to live. It's not our responsiblity to worry but just have fun and be a child of God. He doesn't want us to live a life of worry and fear. He want us to live a life of love and praise to Him, hard work and good deeds for the weak, poor and needy. God is going to pay our bills, take care of health and all our other needs. We really have to look at him as not only our Father but our Daddy. And he feels the same way when he sees us sitting in our room worrying how the rent is going to be paid, not enjoying our lives, spreading love to others, and bringing glory to his name. If his eye is on the sparrow and he provides worms for them then I know he's watching me. There's a scripture somewhere in the bible that says he knows how many strands of hair are on our heads, now how comforting is that. I can just imagine HIM hovering on me while I'm a sleep with my head in his lap counting each and every strand of my hair (and I don't know about you but I love having my hair played with)! What a great feeling to know how much He loves, adores, and treasures me. Some people say that God doesn't always answer our prayers but I've heard that He does answer our prayers sometimes the answer is just no but now I know to trust and respect His no's yet have faith, believe and expect the best yes even when I don't understand it's only because he plans for me to eat ice-cream after my dinner.

I Won, I won!

I enter contest all the time with no expectations of winning but with my fingers still crossed behind my back. The first time I won a contest was when I was 13yrs old. I won tickets from my favorite radio station at 2:00 a.m., to see my favorite rap group at the time, Kris Kross. That was so long ago and I hadn't won a single thing since then. That was until now. In recent weeks I have entered maybe five contest, and out of those five, I have won three! That, in my book, is amazing. The amazing part about it is not that I actually won a contest, but because out of those five, the three that I did win where prizes that I actually wanted or needed for specific purposes meeting certain needs of my life. The other two, I entered on a thought of "why not, its a contest". My point here is not to brag, but I realized that while for so long when I wasn't winning contest for free cars or vacations, those where not things that I needed in my life at the time. But what I did need is what I have been given.

For the opportunities to win these great prizes I would like to give a thanks first to All Things Creative at www.nnekaseran.blogspot.com, from whom I won a beautiful basket from Tea and Honey Blends hair care product line for natural hair. The Gleam Shine Serum and Curl Definer does a great job on my daughters hair that produces more frizz than I can handle some days.

Second, I would like to thank a good friend Sherell Anderson, for the Sweet Pea body spray and lotion from Bath & Body Works, and the feel good lip gloss by E.L.F.. And Lastly, to www.chitownfashionista.com for the Misikko Hana Elite Flat Iron which was a major need for my profession as a hair stylist. I had been saving up now for months now so that I could purchase one for my birthday. With value of almost $400, I would have been saving for quite a long time.


And of course I would like to thank God for with out you none of this is possible and with you I know that all things are possible. Thank you (exit stage left).

In the Words of Satan - The Arrows

This video was shared with me from one of my favorite cousins. She was blessed with an amazing voice that she uses to praise the Lord 24/7, and spends alot of her time searching for other artist that use their talents to do the same. She posted the video on my FB page and it took me almost a week to even view and I'm so glad that I did. I'm not familiar with the band The Arrows, but this song has caught my attention. The message is deep and actually made my eyes well up with tears of joy and thankfulness for the grace and mercy that has been given to my family. I serve and amazing God and I am so glad that I know. Take time to sit through this 6 minute video. It'll be worth the time.

Donnie McClurkin feat. Karen Clark Sheard - Wait on the Lord

Mommy Day Care

The summer is still fresh and I am worn out already. I wouldn't trade my stay at home mom position for the world, but there has got to be a better way. It's not so much the kids that I keep, but my one kid that is never satisfied. Understandably, Nielah, my 7yr. old, is fed up with being my assistant and hates it when her time for attention comes upon us because the time is spent doing work books and learning activities on the computer. I wish there was more that I could do, but with my demanding and untimely schedule between the kids and hair, I am lost(im working hard to find my crafting skills at the same time, which still seem to be lost as well).

Rambunctious Nielah

In this August addition of Parenting Magazine, there is a great article named "Camp Mamawanda" that talks about creating you own summer camps with a collaboration of other stay at home parents. The idea is that each parent host camp at their home for a day. The best part about this idea is that it is practically free! And with the high prices of summer camps and day cares now, what more could you ask for.
Each parent picks a theme for the day and builds their schedule around that theme. For example: animal exploration day would consist of the morning starting off with coloring sheets with different animals while waiting for everyone to arrive for the day. Then moving on to books, songs, and circle time and different indoor and outdoor activities all based around the animal theme. Be mindful and picky without shame as to the parents and kids that you choose to include, and open communication and consideration is a big must when dealing with other peoples children.
I will definitely be working on this for next summer. It allows plenty of free time during the week for each parent and is a big save on the pockets and your nerves!
Now recruiting!

God's Pharmacy

It's been said that God first separated the salt water from fresh, made dry land, planted a garden, made animals and fish.....All before making a human. He made and provided what we'd need before we were born. These are best & more powerful when eaten raw. We're such slow learners....God left us a great clue as to what foods help what part of our body! God's Pharmacy! Amazing!

1. A slice carrot looks like the human eye. The pupil, iris and radiating lines look just like the human eye...And YES, science now shows carrots greatly enhance blood flow to and function of the eyes. (should have listened to mommy)

2. A tomatoes has four chambers and is red. The heart has four chambers and is red. All of the research shows tomatoes are loaded with lycopine and are indeed pure heart and blood food.

3. Grapes hang in a cluster that has the shape of the heart. Each grape looks like a blood cell and all of the research today shows grapes are also profound heart and blood vitalization food.

4. A walnut looks like a little brain, a left and right hemisphere, upper cerebrums and lower cerebellums. Even the wrinkles or folds on the nut are just like the neo-cortex. We know walnuts help develop more than 3 dozen neuron- transmitters for brain function.

5. Kidney beans actually heal and help maintain kidney function and YES, they look exactly like the human kidney.

6. Bones are 23% sodium and these foods are 23% sodium. If you don't have enough sodium in your diet, the body pulls it from the bones, thus making them weak. These foods replenish the skeletal needs of the body.

7. Avocados, eggplant and pears target the health function of the womb and cervix of the female- they look just like these organs. Today's research shows that when a woman eats one avocado a week, it balances hormones, sheds unwanted birth weight, and prevents cervical cancers. And how profound is this? It takes exactly 9 months to grow avocado from blossom to ripened fruit. There are over 14,000 photolytic chemical constituents of nutrition in each one of these foods (modern science has only studied and named about 141 of them).

8. Figs are full of seeds ad hang in twos when they grow. Figs increase the mobility of male sperm and increase the numbers of sperm as well to overcome male sterility(FYI).

9.Sweet potatoes look like the pancreas and actually balance the glycemic index of diabetes.

10.Olives assist the health and function of the ovaries.

11. Oranges, grapefruit and other citrus fruits look like the mammary glands of the female and actually assist the health of the breast and the movement of lymph in and out of the breast.

12. Onions look like the body cells. Today's research shoes onions help clear waste materials from all of the body cells. They even produce tears which wash the epithelial layers of the eyes. A working companion, garlic also helps eliminate waste materials and dangerous free radicals from the body.

Its utterly amazing how God thought of absolutely everything before we where placed on His Earth. He vowed to take care of all of our needs, all we have to do is search for Him and ask. It's our job to allow Him to take the lead and follow the directions that were layed out for us from the beginning of time.

Casting All Your Care On Him

There's no storms that we can't weather
If we cast all... our care upon Him,
Under His wings, He will shelter you,
Trusting in Jesus..upon Him we can depend.

O Lord may I trust you more and more
More like Jesus, loving and true,
Give me the strength, as I try daily,
To give more of myself...afresh to you.

Let's be faithful to our loving Savior
Sheltered in Him, with love so strong,
He is our strength, adoration, and hope,
Someday we will hear, My Child, well done!

Through days of trials, God is there
With outstretched arms He waits,
Just trust in Him...His word believe,
If faithful, crowns of life we will recieve.

By Bernice Ward

Earnest Pugh 'Rain On Us'

Daily Devotion

"Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves."

Roman 12:9-10

Confidence Galore

I absolutely love the Pinkett- Smith family. As a wife, mother and business woman, Jada Pinkett- Smith is a woman to consider as a role model for us all. She has a strong hand on discipline, which next to love I believe is a major key in raising children. My motto, "spare the rod, spoil the child"!

But what I love the most about Jada how she allows her children to be the person that God made them to be. She doesn't push her children to look a certain way or forces them into the entertainment world behind her and their father, Will Smith. If you have seen any interviews with the Pinkett- Smith off spring, you can notice the genuine love for what they do as a family. They are very well behaved, punctual kids and I love it when they are asked a question from a reporter and they will look at the mommy to make sure that it is okay to answer ( my daughter does the same as well).

Willow Smith, 8yrs old, has personality that I know very well through my own daughter. Below Jada talks about Willow and her sassy individual style:

"She decided, 'I want hair like my grandmother's.' I said 'Willow, grandma has not hair- you have to have some hair.' And she said, "Mom I'm really tired of the hair. I just really feel like I'd like it to get in the pool. I want to swim. I just dont want to be bothered with the hair" After discussing it with my husband Will, Willow was given permission to shave the sides of her head."

Per Willows Stylist, The mohawk, which is a favorite style of mine at the moment for the same reasons as Willow, fit her personality:

"Look, It's 2010. Cant out little girls move into the future without ruffling feathers? The look is fun, empowering, anti-relaxer and anti weave. More women need to steer their little girls in this direction. If your child is a forward-thinker, you should guide her instead of something her."

My kind of girl!

What Great Weekends Are Made Of

It's been a very long time since I had a weekend out of the house and doing exactly everything that I wanted to do. I had no heads to do, the oldest kiddie was gone and the youngest had his options ( which is mostly to hang with daddy-no complaints).The highlight of my weekend was meeting author and Episcopal priest Mpho Tutu at Richmond Hill retreat located in historical Churchill. Pastor Mpho Tutu is the daughter of Archbishop Desmond Tutu, author of Made For Goodness and why this makes all the difference, but is known for so much more. Archbishop Desmond Tutu is a Nobel Peace Prize winner, and veteran of the moral movement that ended apartheid in South Africa. I have highlighted Made For Goodness in a previous post archived under "The Book Club". I'm still reading it which will make 2 months now ( it isnt one of those books that you read through and sit on the shelf. You must study and meditate on its words) and I had no choice but to finally buy the book and have my own autographed. The library will be very happy to have their copy back. Disappointingly, I missed the discussion but was on time for the book signing. As you can see I was able to take a picture with Pastor Tutu after I embarrassingly knocked her cup of water onto the carpet of one of the Holiest buildings of Richmond cities history. She graciously laughed it off with a joke, "it'll help the carpet to grow", and smiled big for the camera. It was a great experience and glad Im didn't miss it. I'm even glad that I knocked over her water, makes for a great story one day.

The rest of my weekend was spent enjoying the company of my family at one of my favorite cousin's house warming party. I also attended Sunday morning service joined by my 14 month old son who hasn't been to service since being a newborn. He is not much of a people person and I had reservations about him acting out, but surprisingly he did an awesome job. He loves music, as he should given our family, and when the children's choir sung he was in seventh heaven singing, dancing, and clapping. My daughter had been away for a few days visiting grandparents and seeing her face in an unfamiliar environment was the icing on the cake for his new experience.

I also attended my 2nd Cash for Gold Party of the month and made some extra cash. Cash for Gold is the party that keeps on giving! At my friends party they also did a debut of her sisters hand made line of jewelry, Lucky Charm. Each piece of jewelry was individually hand crafted and with it held an emotion, a meaning, or purpose labeled with its own special tag. Absentmindedly, I threw away the tag to the bracelet that I purchased (shown below). The designer, April Anderson, is a unique individual and all of her pieces speak of her character of being a strong confident woman. I look forward for more from this young lady.

my purchase, $7.

Last but not least, I was able to fit in the summer Gospel Festival at Dogwood Dell. It was a great crown of course with even better music. During the show we did received some very disappointing news about the death of minister in music Walter Hawkins, whom lost his fight with cancer during the show. A moment of silence was given and the praises went up for we know that he is in a better place away from the pain.

This weekend, in my opinion, was set aside just for me. I give give thanks for the most minuscule of things and this is one of them. No babies, no heads, no stress, just blessed!

Released

So, I have finally let loose the chains of slavery that held me to making post. Don't get me wrong, I love my blog, but I am not in love with it. I started this as an outlet for my growth in Christ and as an outlet for all things that excite me like God, hair, my kids, and life in general. But I found myself searching for followers and checking in how many people viewed and commented. I would also want to post eeevvverything that felt good at any moment. There is nothing wrong with that, but my time is limited and I was being selfish. I would really get down and out when I could post and almost shut it down at one time. When that time came I just stopped and asked the Lord to guide me, keep me in check and in line with His purpose. Since that prayer I have no concerns if no one ever sees this. Now this is my diary of sorts, and reference for me to look back on and remember happy days when sad ones have come and the joys that I experienced at certain moments. And I pray that for those eyes that do see this, maybe they can relate and take something away from it all. With that being said, until next time........

Fred Hammond - This Is the Day - 2006

Kelis - Weekend [Feat. Will.I.Am]

Whitney Houston & CeCe Winans Count on Me Live

Daily Devotion

A friend loves at all times. He is there to help when trouble comes.

Proverbs 17:17

KIRK FRANKLIN - HOSANA

Beauty Alert: Thinning Edges

Ladies, we have many responsibilities on a daily basis and taking care of ourselves should be at the top of it, but sadly, it isn't. One of my peeves as a hairstylist, is my women constantly damaging and drying out the front edges and the back of the hair. This usually comes from not using the proper material to wrap the hair at night, and with constant moving and rubbing against the pillow, the roots are dried and then begin to break off. This is a huge problem with a simple fix. Moisture, moisture and more moisture! On a daily basis, preferably before night time, apply grease to the edges of the scalp and rub it in thoroughly. Wrapping your hair at night with a satin or silk scarf will also allow for less breakage and drying of the entire head. It's not hard and doesn't take all day.

I recommend Doo Gro Mega Thick Medicated Hair Vitalizer. This brand specifically helps thinning edges and temples and promotes anti- thinning for thick strong and healthy hair. Doo Gro Products can be found in your local beauty supply store.

Marvin Winans- I'm over it now

Cant Hold On Hang On

My significant other has the quote Cant hold on hang on, tattooed on the back of his right hand. I never quite understood the meaning of it until it finally hit me when doing one of my many self evaluations. Every now and then, as we Christians often do, I loose focus and my mind wonders from its rightful place with the Lord. I get wrapped up in keeping house, staying on schedule with my kids, and fitting new appointments into my already short days. I know I have gotten off of track when my temper becomes shorter with my rambunctious 7 year old, or when I want to turn in early because of built up frustration and anxiety from a busy day. It was on one of these days that the meaning of that quote, Cant hold on hang on, made perfect sense. When I loose my focus and feel these moments of frustration and overwhelming anxiety begin to fill my veins, I simply need to hang on to the promises of better days. Hang on to the memories of those days when my mind was fixed on the Lord, allowing him to guide my every step from sun up to sun down. Those days where filed with absolute joy with thoughts of the Lord being my guiding light. Training me, and molding me to fit hit master plan.
We all need these days. We all loose sight and its because of these days that we are able to recognize our blessings. Recognize the mercy that we have been given over and over again that has pulled us through these days. I'm holding tight to my faith and hanging on His every word, and with that, I'm looking forward to these days that are sure to come.

No Efforts In The Flesh

"Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak."Matthew 26:41

Have you ever wondered why it seems to be so hard to "walk in the spirit", but so easy to "walk in the flesh"? The answer to this is no great mystery- actually, it's very simple. Walking in or living in or minding the things of the flesh takes absolutely no effort at all on our part. Giving into the flesh means that you go along with what it wants to do. There is no struggle, no battle, no discomfort. You are being led around like a puppy on a lease that is not putting up a fight. If my flesh wants to stay in bed late, how much effort does it take to turn back over? If it wants to lay on the couch for hours at a time and watch television, does that take any work on my part? If it wants to eat until it "pops", the only effort involved is to continue to pick up your fork and put it to your mouth. Yielding to the flesh is effortless and mindless- it's takes no "brains" to go along with it's desires. It requires no discipline so therefore it's easier to "walk in the flesh".

It's only when you decide to "give into the spirit" that the battle begins. Why? Because your flesh won't be getting it's way any longer. It has to make some changes. It's having to do some denying, it's losing control. It takes effort to deny your flesh. It takes a determination of will and mind. It involves having to do something, having to fight, to wage war, to engage in combat, having to get uncomfortable, having to give up something- this is "work".

Walking in the flesh may be easier because it takes no effort to do so, but the consequences in the long run are great. Making the effort to deny your flesh in order to walk in the spirit, is worth it and will bring a great reward with it. So, walk in the spirit and stop giving into the flesh.

Have a blessed day. It takes no effort to walk in the flesh, but the effort it takes to walk in the spirit is worth it.

Reference About The Master's Business Ministry.